My husband and I are finishing dinner. Freezer rice and chicken – too tired to cook real food. I tell him about my crappy day and how two of the three interviews turned out to be a bust. And I got up at 6.30 for that! Feeling empty like a our fridge, I pour us two cups of tea and I consider adding a shot to mine, then think better of it. Can’t fix stupid with alcohol.
“Do you ever practice out loud? Like what you’d say to a client?” I ask him, sipping my tea.
“Sure,” he says. “Didn’t you notice?”
Considering that my husband has been doing the same thing for 30 years and is still loving it, it’s a revelation.
“I practice benefit statements all the time,” he says.
“What the heck is that?”
“It’s like when you’re selling someone rental coverage and they don’t know they need it yet. So you have to explain it in a way they understand,” he says. “Like whether they will need a second car if theirs breaks down.’”
“You lost me,” I say. My brain has been dead since 5 pm.
“So it works like this. You wouldn’t say, ‘Are you looking for a man with a big dick?’” he explains.
Tea splutters out of my mouth.
He says, “You would say, ‘Are you looking for a man that can keep you satisfied…’”