“It’s clear like vodka and bubbles like Champaign,” I think as I stare at a drink of a person next to me. The guy a size of Vesuvius, with folds of terrains that look like lava slides, takes a gulp (probably not vodka) and stabs his fork into a bloody prime rib. Carnivorous. He probably has just as good fillet parts himself.
I should be nicer. It’s just being in a Las Vegas buffet, a bowling alley of food, is hard when you’ve worked so hard on depriving yourself sticking to a healthier plan.
But that’s the only place, rather than the food court, that will honor my food voucher from work. Plus who doesn’t like a good challenge?
My body is longing for a drink – purely to help with the visual gustatory overload. But I still have three interviews to go and no scheduled nap time. Instead, I pick up a plate and begin to examine the choices – each little thing screaming “eat me!!” like I’m Alice in Wonderland.
Here’s the thought process. Skip the pizzas and the rest of breads, including the bread pudding, likely just the bread that didn’t get eaten in time. Skip things that are an obvious combination of fat and flour – like soups, chowders and deep fried stuff. Go easy on the green leafy vegetables – they are smothered with butter to make them palatable to people who want to kid themselves about their healthy eating habits.
“Miss, do you know if they have ice cream here?” the Rocky Mountains peak next to me wants to know.
“I’d check in the desserts area,” I say, trying not to look in that direction. How do I know that an army of tiny cups with tiramisu and chocolate pudding is on the offensive there?
Judging by his plate, a whole species of crabs has gone extinct. He says, “I tried but got sidetracked by the legs.”
Las Vegas buffets are like a liquor store. Even if there are lots of choices, you generally don’t have to consumer the whole thing. Pick wisely – and enjoy!
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